.This term we have been looking at ways to make our writing more interesting for the reader.
We have used the following criteria to guide us:
Changing the word order of a sentence
Using literary devices such as metaphor, simile, alliteration, onomatopoeia and personification
Using specific verbs and adjectives
Using show, don’t tell techniques
Using different sentence beginnings and lengths
Here are some examples of my writing this term.
Show don’t tell: Emotions
Happy: My tired legs stumbled onto the grass like rubber. I looked up into the sky and told myself to get up and keep going! I stepped up off the wet grass and the ball came to my feet. My first reaction was to slam the ball into the back of the net. And that's exactly what happened!
Sad: I was slowly walking down the hallway with my gloomy eyes anchored down to the surface of the floor. My weak arms were drifting across the carpet as I carried on walking. “I miss my dog, when do you think he’s going to come back?” I asked mum. She replied “I don’t think he’s going to come back sweetheart, But no need to worry, he’s in a better place now.
Angry: On A late Saturday morning me and my family decided that we’d go on a trip to the rainbow theme park! I've never been to this place but I've heard that it’s really fun. When we got there, there was one ride that definitely stood out, The Dropper! It turned out I wasn't allowed on it because you had to be 13 or older. I was so bummed!
The Midnight Thief
(915 AD)-(1,101 years ago)
Many years ago there was a grand castle named Kingsalot Kingdom. The only way to find the castle was to swim across the ocean, hike over an 8,000 ft mountain, walk across a blazing hot desert, then you’d arrive at the kingdom, if you survived that is!
The castle was ruled by a wise old man named Frederick George Alfred the third, king Fred for short. Lately there’s been an unknown man roaming around the kingdom hallways at night. Fred didn't know much about this man, he thought it must’ve just been one of the villagers going for a walk. But it turned out it was much, much worse.
The next night the King decided to have a look out his window for any sign of the man. He waited, and waited. After about an hour of watching a pale empty hallway, he slowly dozed off to sleep. “Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.” The King was fast asleep until he heard something come from the hallway. “Clank, clink!” Fred’s tired eyes opened. “Uuuuuuh!” The King gasped. He saw a dark outline of a man stealing from the King’s cabinet, It was far too dark for the King to describe the man properly. “Hey, hey you!” The King yelled out to the man. As soon as the dark man heard the king yell out. he was out of there. Suddenly, a thought flew into his head. He’d make a trap! That night the king stayed up until the next morning making blueprints. After hours of planning, the King was ready!
The Boy
One day I was walking home from school on my own. After about five minutes I remembered that I had a few dollars left over in my bag. I was wondering where I was going to spend it. Suddenly I came across a video game store. At that moment I knew exactly what I was going to buy! Viking destroyer 2! The best game of 2016 and it just came out! Although it was a cool game I think there were wiser things to spend it on. After a few minutes I decided not to buy the game. I walked, and walked, until I got to my street. I was outside of my house, I saw that mums car wasn't home. “Hmmm?” I said to myself. I decided to go inside anyway. It was quiet inside, which was unusual. I dropped my bag on the cold wooden floor. It was about 5 o'clock now and I was starting to get really worried. It was that moment when I heard a car pull up at the driveway. I ran over to the window and peeked through the blinds. “Huh!” It was mum. I ran out the front door see mums frightened face. “Where have you been, I told you that I was going to pick you up after school!” Oh my gosh, I totally forgot, I thought it my head. Mum told me that she had been rummaging around the whole town looking for me for 3 hours. And from this, mum told me never to walk home by myself. I was so relieved that mum came home, I wouldn't know what i’d do without her.
Viking Girl
Uggghhh! I've had It! I hate going to bed early! I ran upstairs went into my room and swung the door closed behind me! I sat down at the end of my cold bed and looked out my window. As I looked outside I could faintly see my reflection staring back at me. “Why does nobody like me”. Is it because of my helmet, of even my appearance, I don’t know, but whatever it is I just wish That I was normal. :(
-By Carter.
